I laughed to myself this morning as I read Psalm 42-43 because these verses reminded me of my lament to God and to my sometimes “to and fro” confidence in God’s provision.
From a purely theological standpoint, I’m confident that God will provide for every need that I have. He will provide for my family according to His Plan, not according to mine. To the extent that I can become so close to Him, that His will supplants mine, then His Plan becomes my plan. Not real deep, but it’s true.
The Psalmist (not likely David) begins with a statement of complete confidence and desire for God. “As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the Living God. When shall I come and appear before God?” Psalm 42:1-2.
Although he (like me) desires for God’s heart and is confident that God desires to commune with him, he still blames God for his travails and troubles. He places the responsibility on God for his troubles in verse 7 where he writes, “Deep calls unto deep at the noise of Your waterfalls; All Your waves and billows have gone over me.” Although he seeks God’s heart like a deer seeks water, he asserts that his troubles arise because God allow the waves of life (waves created by God and referred to as “Your waves”) to buffet him.
As I struggle in many businesses, I hear myself praying, “God, I’ve been trusting you. What gives here?” I want my God, my Jehovah Jirah, to provide for me (AND DO IT NOW)! I was reflecting on these similarities and laughing a little at myself. As I moved to Proverbs 23, I read this verse: “My son give me your heart and let your eyes observe my face.” Proverbs 23:26.
I was stopped in my tracks. God wants me to look into His eyes, and trust Him. I need to be so close to the Father that I can look into His eyes and “observe” His face. If I’m that close to Him, my time of lament would be over. The times of trouble may continue, but my lament would not.
So I’m turning now . . . looking into his eyes.
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